WOMEN ONLY COMMUNITY MEN PLEASE DO NOT COMMENT*
It’s something I’ve seen thrown at women a fair bit. Feminazi, stripping men’s rights, feminism has gone too far blah blah. Has anyone ever accused you of it? And any women said this to you?
No, actually, now that I think about it… I’m taking this as a sign that I need to get more extreme with my feminism
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This doesn’t happen to me much, but it happens to other women I know. I have a lot of male friends and I’ve talked to them over the years about their perspective on feminism, and what makes them say things critical of feminism. A lot of it comes down to a misunderstandings – take for instance the conflation between patriarchy (of a system) and sexism (of an individual). Or “#notallmen” – as women we don’t really care that it’s
#notallmen
, the fact of the matter is that because it’s enough men, it’s#yesallwomen
; whereas to men this sounds like an accusation.Of course, there’s some things that aren’t about miscommunications and are just philosophical differences. Expressing support for affirmative action, for instance, is likely to get one in hot water, no matter how politely you phrase it.
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I don’t really agree that it’s close to all men who let misogynistic behaviour slide. My point is that it’s enough bad men (where “bad” includes “letting that behaviour slide”) that it’s still a problem for women.
I’ve been accused of this a fair bit. I couldn’t tell you how often I’ve talked about women’s issues to be told “but what about men… you’re being reverse exist etc”. I’ve lost count of how many men have said about “men’s rights” when it’s not a pie, more for us don’t mean less for them. It’s particularly nasty online, breathe a word about feminism and you can be attacked HARD.
I’ve had comments from women but far less so. I’ve been accused of thinking all men are bad when ones behaviour was creeping me out (turned out I was right). Sadly I’ve worked with a woman in the domestic abuse field who put the perpetrator first. She’d excuse and defend him, and was always talking about how hard life was for men and what “man hating feminists” had done to them. Unsurprisingly she was in an abusive relationship.
It seems feminism is a dirty word to a lot of people which is sad
Are we prepared to talk about the subtle (or sometimes unsubtle) misogynist (plus intersections of transphobia, homophobia, and racism) streak on the Fediverse? I’ve gotten the weirdest pushback for relatively mild takes with such frequency I’ve come to expect it. I am not afraid to block anyone who is being a prick, but if anything I post gets a modicum of attention I have to avoid my inbox like the plague or be sealioned to death. I don’t remember it being this bad on reddit (but I think communities self-sorted better with a larger userbase).
Yep we face it all the time in our group, we get the manosphere making nasty and/or anti trans remarks or passive aggressive trolling. That’s why posts like this have to be flagged as women only so they’ve got no excuse. We’re ruthless with the ban button though so its manageable.
It’s really sad cos we’ve had so many incredibly supportive men cheering for or quietly upvoting us. I don’t remember reddit being this bad but I think you’re right, they stuck to their own areas.
You might try checking if those guys are based on thecsame (cluster of) server(s).
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